Over the weekend, we went sale-ing. Bargains were abundant, as the nearby town had a semi-annual event - the city-wide garage sales. We live out in the sticks, so having our own yard sale has proven pointless, as no one can find us LOL
But trolling into town was a blast. The streets were packed…from the old section of town, centered around Main Street, which looks like it is straight of a western, to the newest McMansion suburbs.
It is this dichotomy that fascinates me. The faces and voices in the crowd range from the old timer in overalls, anxious to strike up a conversation peppered with “in my day”; to the elderly women selling crocheted toilet paper holders; to the Mennonites, clad in their white bonnets and handmade dresses looking for canning jars.
Then there is the Prada crowd (yes we DO have that out here in Hickville LOL) pushing their $300 baby strollers. I hate to stereotype, but damn, they act like they own the friggin’ road, pushing that charmed-life infant right out in front of traffic. Don’t you see all the dents in my beat-up car? Don’t you see the crazy look in my eye? What makes you think I won’t run right over you and your pretentiously-named progeny? LOL
I ran across several people I hadn’t seen in a while, and got to spend some time with a friend I’d lost touch with. She looked great, and was grilling hot dogs to sell to passers-by. We sat down to munch a dog and catch up. I said, “God you look fantastic! What’s your secret?” She leaned over and whispered, “We’re having great sex ever since I shaved…down there.” Well, that nearly made ME spit out my hot dog, but I just giggled, and replied, “I don’t think that’d work for me. I’m older and wrinklier than you. If I shaved it would look like a Shar-Pei.” She spit her hot dog halfway across the driveway - LOL!
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Today is the last day of school for Daughter, but not really LOL
She failed a class so I will be taking her to summer school starting in June. Sorry, I can’t think of how to make that funny yet LOL
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Posted by Marti @ 
Well, you certainly WON’T, will ya! lol Have a nice Memorial Day weekend, Marti. The boys have this week and 3 half days next and then they are out. Then I will have the most surreal experience in the last 19 1/2 years: I will have my house to myself for one week! They will be back on the 10th as Cody *sigh* has summer school starting 6/12.
May 23rd, 2006 at 9:59 am
Now that is certainly something to think about, my epitaph. No, I’m serious!
Here lies a woman who WANTED to write, but never got around to it. So, to prevent her from coming back and haunting you, just go along with everyone else and remember her as a writer, mmmKay?
This of course, is my pathetic attempt at remaining on your blogroll. I’m not transparent, am I? *grin*
May 23rd, 2006 at 12:09 pm
Kel - We can commiserate together about summer school - LOL That’s exciting about you having the house to yourself!
***
Karen - No worries…you’ve got a permanent home on the ol’ roll - LOL
May 23rd, 2006 at 12:23 pm
I am SO glad that little voice told me to swallow my pepsi before I read on! Shar-Pei! HAHAHAHA! Have a great week!
May 23rd, 2006 at 1:20 pm
when i read this i spit out my hotdog all over the keyboard. thanks a lot.
j/k funny stuff!
May 23rd, 2006 at 2:41 pm
Hi Marti!!! I love sales if there are some cool products and by the way, for the avatar thingy just send me a 67 x 70 images something within that range
May 23rd, 2006 at 3:03 pm
If I would of been eating a hotdog while reading your blog…I definitely would of spit it out!! Damn that was funny!! Laugh out Loud funny!! Keep it up!
Peace!
May 23rd, 2006 at 6:30 pm
I loved the bit about the Shar-pei.
Hope you have a wonderful Memorial Day!
May 23rd, 2006 at 8:50 pm
the sharpei bit was too funny!! Great laughs always over here.
May 23rd, 2006 at 11:12 pm
hi marti! belated happy memorial day!
wow, even in your community has a thing called “status symbol” (in your case prada, while in our case, braces and cellular phones).
anyway, i just tagged you (the meme’s at my latest post), hope you won’t mind
May 24th, 2006 at 6:57 am
Empress -I saw the meme tag! I added a whole category for the memes (in the sidebar). The answers are there. Hope you have a lovely weekend!
May 24th, 2006 at 7:47 am
Hi Marti, we don’t hear much about your memorial day here in Oz but hope it all goes well and see you when you return.
May 24th, 2006 at 8:18 am
I thought we were the only ones who actually “memorialized” on Memorial Day. Not so much now that my great grandpa is gone, but when he was living, we’d go cemetary-ing every year with him. Good times.
LMAO at Shar-pei, btw. Too funny!
May 24th, 2006 at 9:58 am
funny! New blog visitor here! Came by via B.E.
May 24th, 2006 at 11:31 am
Happy Memorial Day renewal marti.
May 24th, 2006 at 12:17 pm
Do you have the WW as a page and not a post? It doesn’t show up here and doesn’t allow comments
It was totally funny, tho as I did follow your links!
May 24th, 2006 at 1:42 pm
Hi Marti! I’m trying to visit a few Wordless Wednesdays……and saw your kitty picture….too funny!!
My W W is up
May 24th, 2006 at 1:50 pm
Shar-pei. I’m glad I wasn’t eating a hot dog when I read that!
May 24th, 2006 at 1:55 pm
Here lies Hoss all broken-hearted
Came to shit and only farted.
Rest in Peace.
May 24th, 2006 at 3:39 pm
Happy Memorial Day, Marti!
I liked your yard sale details. The one thing I always love about yard sales is the yard sale people — the real “yardsalers” with their old cars filled to the roof with stuff from other yard sales. They pull up in front of your house, stopping their car just about in the middle of the street, getting out of the car and leaving the doors open while they check out what you’ve got. They pick up a Toaster with a 25cent sticker and say “will ya take a dime?” They are the best.
May 24th, 2006 at 10:39 pm
Hehe! Great post!
Spitting hotdogs and “pretentiously-named progeny” - lol!
May 25th, 2006 at 12:15 pm
I really love the part about the shaved thingy. It also made me spit the apple I’ve been munching!!!
May 26th, 2006 at 8:00 am
Whew! Thank goodness I wasn’t eating a hot dog when I was reading this!
May 26th, 2006 at 10:19 pm
shar-pei huh? That was enough to blow a hot dog out through a nostril….a WHOLE hot dog.
Great post!
May 27th, 2006 at 5:03 pm