These are excuse notes from parents collected by schools from all over the country:
1) Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot.
2) Dear School: Please excuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also 33.
3) Please excuse Roland from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip.
4) John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.
5) Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part.
6) Please excuse Pedro from being absent yesterday. He had (diahre) (dyrea) (direathe) the runs. [Words in ( )’s were crossed out.]
7) Irving was absent yesterday because he missed his bust.
8) Please excuse Jimmy for being. It was his father’s fault.
9) Please excuse Jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get the Sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it Monday, we thought it was Sunday.
10) Sally won’t be in school a week from Friday. We have to attend her funeral.
11) Please excuse Mary for being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps.
12) Please excuse little Jimmy for not being in school yesterday. His father is gone and I could not get him ready because I was in bed with the doctor.
Categories: Jokes
Posted by Marti @ 
OMG, those kids clearly NEED to be in school, because they sure aren’t going to learn much at home!
January 9th, 2006 at 2:52 pm
Too funny
. They reminded me of some of the notes I tried to pass off way back when.
January 9th, 2006 at 3:28 pm
LOL “his father was gone and I was in bed with gramps.”
…Suspiciously thinking that maybe the kids wrote some of those.
…Excellent gems.
January 9th, 2006 at 9:27 pm
Excellent! LOL!
January 9th, 2006 at 10:35 pm
LOL! I was giggling BIG TIME while reading those!
Kel
January 10th, 2006 at 12:54 am
I had her shot, that was funny!
January 10th, 2006 at 8:33 am
It’s a good thing those kids aren’t being homeschooled.
January 10th, 2006 at 9:03 am
omg, I thought #8 was really funny, until I read the rest of the list. hahaha
January 10th, 2006 at 9:35 am
Oh yeah, and we KNOW the parents wrote those notes, don’t we?
January 10th, 2006 at 10:00 am
#10 really cracked me up. this post also reminds me all of those lousy excuse letters my classmates made. But , I remember one from a teacher of mine before when he said “class i’ll be absent next week because i’ll be sick” I guess he was a clairvoyant lol
January 10th, 2006 at 10:08 am
LOL, I think I got tea up my nose from laughing so hard!
January 10th, 2006 at 12:58 pm
” Please excuse Jimmy for being. It was his father’s fault.”
The best… tho the one with gramps was good too! LOL
January 10th, 2006 at 1:09 pm